*-. Iz all good! .-*

Mis queridos amigos blogueros y no blogueros, los que me leen a diario o una vez al mes, los que sonrien al ver mis lineas y me dan los comentarios despues, los que van absorbiendo los pedacitos de una autobiografia desorganizada... no los he botado!! Ya estoy en Filadelfia, mi familia se fue anoche (vinieron to drop me off). Esta tarde tengo mi primera clase... The weather here is nice. Philly tiene mucha historia, theres tons of old buildings and trees. La uni es bien, no dike chiquita pero tampoco asi dike monstruosa. Everyones uber polite. Bueno theres tons to tell... un beso y abrazo to my homies back in the DR!! hehehe. :)

*-. Untitled .-*

No se si me malacostumbre o me malacostumbraste No se si es importante echarle la culpa a alguien A esta altura de juego la verdad no tiene sentido A esta altura de juego solo queda la nostalgia Tonto pensar que alguna vez me aferre a ti de tal manera Que pense que la vida no seria lo mismo si no estabas en ella Aunque no confundas, porque i didnt take you for granted Eventhough I never could imagine such a thought as you beeing gone And one does not realize the everchanging shifts of friendship The way that its so strong and so fragile, all at once The way we so many times consider it a given The way it can dissappear just like that Am I sad? Mad? Should I feel this way? Can I? Do I only miss you because I got so used to you? Is it supposed to be simple or plain complicated to move on? Maybe I just have a hard time moving on

*-. Pit stop .-*

She decided to stop and smell the roses Something told her the frenzy had to stop No one's gonna figure things out for her They're just not gonna work themselves out It was time to get a good night's sleep Even to prioritize a bit Getting ready wasn't all that simple It was more like a spiritual thing And once in a while you gotta do it Think about what's right But all that thinkin' by itself won't do it You gotta go out there and make it right A little willpower, a little ingredient X The umph, the jump, the power to make it work So don't just stop and smell the roses Don't just sit there figuring out what to do You know it's gonna be allright somehow Just stand up and do what you gotta do

*-. con todo y todo .-*

To make a mistake... it's not subjective, because you know its a mistake. You realized it the second it occured to you. Because, theres always that one second. That fraction of a second... nanosecond even, when you have a choice. A choice to not say/do... because that little -nagging- voice in your head keeps repeating the unfathomable stupidity of what is about to occur... If you want to achieve this... patience is a must. A virtue some would say. Como dice el dicho de Napoleón: "Vísteme lento, que tengo prisa". Because you're aware that running isnt necesary. Pq cuando te des el etrallón, ta bueno que te pase. Que te duela. Por andar juyendo. And it's happened before. A million times before. A very clever definition of stupidity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. Ayer estaba en el teléfono con un amigo, y en una tenía una risita muy particular, but all he was doing was just that, laughing. Y le dije, tu sabes pq tu te tas riendo? Porque tu sabes k aunque tu me dijiste que no haga tal cosa yo lo voy a go ahead and do it anyways. Like i always do. Nevertheless, no me voy a ir en una (ironic, i already have). No no pero en serio. Ni modo. En general i have to say... I'm one happy creature. I feel like a big girl, finally gonna do my own path. Thanks for all the support!! ... que me han dado mis amigos bloggers :) Es tan enorme la diferencia de ayer en la tarde. Me dijeron par de cosa k me tenian like... chaos. Se me aguaban los ojos and i was just like pissed and frustrated y par de cosa ma heh. Y right now I feel like the world is at my feet, anything is possible... lighter, happier. I wonder how long this'll last. I hope a few hours at least :) I hope its contagious too! jejeje. Cheers.

*-. Journal Entry .-*

So I've been going to the shrink. Some people say this word has a negative connotation to it, but nah, it doesnt. Que tan loca tas que llegaste hasta el psicologo? Whats wrong? Howd it go? Bueno, primero que todo, como futura psicologa you gotta work thru your own issues antes de tu go out there and help everyone else. No ta de na tener problemas con x cosa k you dont wanna face, pa k te llegue un paciente con eso mimito y te hagas un etcetera. That and the fact that well, I believe theres always room for improvement. Y un psicologo te ayuda con esas cositas que te has acostumbrado a vivir, pero para que darle la vuelta a la piedra? Vamos a quitarla del camino once and for all. So na me encuentro yo con eta doña. Y digo, ehh como yo voy a habla freely con eta jeva. Y eso que se me hace facil open up. (maybe too easily.. ermm, pue si). So you know me hacen la historia clinica, talk about family and friends and such. It ends up beeing summed up en dos cosas : mis relaciones interpersonales and my self esteem. [...] So i've been lately in one of those funks... entre being just plain sad and then on the brink of a nervous breakdown por to las cosas que tengo k hacer in the next 2 weeks. Todo se ta acumulando... time is going by so fast. Llama al dermatologo, arregla eta cosa que ta lentisima, ayuda a mami con school stuff de mi sis, acuerdate del gym, but dont forget to find out which bank puedes usar en philly... bueno en verda es MIERDA. Todo se resuelve. Pero yo solita me hago un toyo :s [...] For some reason, i dont give myself enough freedom. I dont know if thats the right way to put it. Theres always this little doubt... this very much annoying nagging that goes... WHAT IF... las dudas que me carcomen incesantementeb. Y de alguna manera, la constante contradiccion que i wanna look my best, do my best, be my best... pero i dont allow myself! Because... because... I FEEL LIKE I DONT DESERVE IT... Entonces im terrible at handling piropos. Yes, thank you. And inside of me I know... they're right... but.. what if im not all that? all that smart? all that pretty? all that capable of makin it on my own... It's crazy, completely insane. But wouldnt this world be boring without a bit of insanity?? I cant call it a Ying and a Yang, that would imply there's some sort of balance. Which there's not! Completely smart or completely stupid. Hazlo, brinca, take the chance... which i do! bajo contrOl de impulsos... ejem... or i dont dare! If youre gonna do it, might as well do it right? Go ahead!! Tienes el derecho al motto del army... be all you can be. do you dare? maybe its about time you do.

*-. Sex on the beach .-*

La arena hacia cosquillas en sus pies. El vaivén del mar marcaba el ritmo de ese instante, en vez de algún reloj. La brisa no era exagerada, suficiente para rozar el cabello de ella y darle vuelta a sus rizos. Por un instante, sus pensamientos se conectaron de manera casi cósmica, con su alrededor y entre sí... "Im so lucky to be here with you". Lo pensaron ambos a la vez, y de alguna manera, no tuvieron que decir nada. El silencio era cómodo. Son los momentos en que el pasado no existe, y mucho menos el futuro. Los envolvía el aura del ahora... simplemente. En ese momento, más importante aún que las palabras, estaban las miradas, las sonrisas. La casi inverosímil comprensión mutua. Spiritually connected souls. Las caricias dieron paso a los besos. Entre mordidas y gemidos, se convirtieron en uno solo.