*-. El Flow .-*

At risk of starting this post in a very cliche way, I have to say that change is a part of our lives. This, I believe, I have always known. Of course, accepting change is a lot harder for some people than others, particularly when we are so absorbed in our way of life that it is difficult to see beyond it and impossible to imagine it as any less. Kind of like people couldn't be taken out of the Matrix after a certain age. Anyways, I'm still learning how people come and go. Even family isn't as stable as the Latino community might think. I have always had my friends way up there in the priorities totem pole, in the space they occupy in my heart. And, even more than that, I've always had a lot of trouble letting go. If you hurt me in any way, I will forgive one time too many, even and specially, if it is undeserved. Long after you've forgotten me or let go of me, you still pop in my mind from time to time. And I'm not talking about any one person in particular. I can think of examples that quickly come to mind, (that secret friendship that consisted of phone conversations, the person that helped me discover Nouvelle Vague, the person that showed me how to do grocery shopping, the one i ran into at the Art Garage etc.) The funny thing is that why do I keep holding on to these people, who most obviously (for whatever reason) don't want me as part of their lives any longer? It's not as if i won't keep on meeting people. There are still quite a few stable friendships, and ones that all of a sudden grow from acquaintances to all time favorites. So I shall -and we should all- keep working on that. Accepting the flow. Of how people come and go. What we learn, what they teach us, and even what we teach ourselves in the process. That it goes on, that we go on, that there is a flow; and that as there are "The End"s, we will also find many new beginnings.

*-. Whirlwind .-*

Life comes at you- fast. Before you know it, everything is changing and you're not even sure how you got there. Lately I feel more grown up than ever. Full time job, in an apartment by myself, making an effort to not be late with my bills (and umm not being very succesful at it). Figuring things out with the first serious relationship (so to speak) I've ever had; at least, the first mature relationship I've ever had. I could not have more reasons to be scared; I could not have more reasons to be happy. My support system couldn't actually be better: close friends, family, amazing boyfriend. And I am hesitant to face the Big Bad World, and yet I am facing it. Day by day my life unravels in rewarding yet unexpected ways. It is funny to think how, sometimes, I look myself in the mirror and wonder how nobody else sees the little girl that I see looking back at me. Almost like part of me just refuses to grow up. But who said that's a bad thing?